Struggles for new life

We arrived in Georgia and hung out with Rhonda's uncle Arzym and his family. His newest arrival is a beauty named Olivia. Her mother is Arzym's daughter Terri-Lynn. Watching Terri-Lynn feed Olivia reminded me how dependent children are upon arrival. Olivia fed with seemingly deep-seated hunger, as her Mum removed the bottle to allow me to see her wide inviting eyes the Lil' one went crazy! "Don't bother me, I can't take an appointment, ensuring life continuation here buddy, put that bottle back into 'mi boca' Mommy !" I chuckled thinking "She's already taking charge." as I walked off feeling so good that my lil' ones are way past that stage. I have to keep them out of the fridge' "Dad, can I have .......(add your food or beverage here)..." is normally what I hear preceded by that unmistakable sound of money going down the drain when the refrigerator opens widely and for an extended "Ummmmm.... Let's seeeeee.......What do I want...?" session.

We traveled to the hospital. We came here to ATL (Atlanta, Georgia) to pick up my Mum who is sitting with her Mum who is in the hospital after facing a stroke. Granny walked into her 90 year stage of eldership a few months ago and we marvelled at the grace, love, and memories given by my Mama-family's matriarch. Granny has been known to pray for you and prey upon you if you even thought about being out of line. I have very non-fond memories of her flying sandals violently reminding my head that I needed to mind my manners, behaviors, mouth, etc...

Today Granny-Mum lay struggling after a stroke. This is one of those times when I wonder why someone who devoted her life to serving Christ isn't given better protection by our Lord. Years ago I would have faced an onslaught of flying sandals if I were to ever voice this question and Granny-Mum heard about it. I'm sure that this is one of those "You'll understand when you get older." experiences. After seeing a woman who prayed harder for me than I've ever prayed for myself struggling to breathe, I began to worry that she may have wasted precious prayers upon me that may have prevented this stroke. Those fingers that lovingly held and guided me for years were holding onto to life. The eyes that used to read Biblical stories to a youngster seemed forcefully shut with shudders and a nervousness that was foreign to me.

As I peered around the room I saw the newest father on my Mum's side of the family. I remember when this cousin was born. He asked if I wanted to see his baby. I'm thinking "didn't he have a lil' one last month ?" before realizing that his child was very prematurely born. In the very same hospital this father visits his daughter and great-grandmother. Within minutes he beholds a granny-woman who has been pivotal to his life and his new life. He takes the fam' and I to visit his lil' soldier, Kaori Clowers. Kaori is indeed a soldier. She's breathing 28% oxygen through a tube, she just received her first portion of food today, and she's not even two pounds yet. Cousin shared how he and Kaori's mother often share hospital responsibilities and how he often visits before and after work. He spoke with so much confidence about the surgical procedures Kaori was experiencing as he gave me a tour of all the tubes sticking into this lil' one. I fondly though how the word "Ka" was used to describe the soul by our ancient Kemitian (Egyptian) ancestors and struggled to remember what the name "Ori" meant from one of the African based cultures I've been exposed too. I thought that it might be a Haribu (Hebrew) term, but I wasn't sure. I thought that it meant strength, but I couldn't be sure. Her name had a smooth feel and I experienced an inward feeling of understanding that this child was going to be a powerful force in our family. As her papi' spoke to me Kaori moved, as I spoke she moved and her lips danced as if she were trying to speak to me. I'm sure that at some point in her life, she and I will share a beautiful relationship. She's a soldier.

I returned to Granny. Her feet were moving. I placed my hands on her praying for the Almighty to make it easy upon the family and I. "Thy will be done God, just help us to understand." I then admitted to the ancestors that we were not ready for Granny to join them. "I know it's not up to us - Ancestors, I know it's in God's time, but we ain't ready yet." An understanding wrapped me with a feeling that they (the ancestors) didn't expect to expect her yet either. "Asante-Sana Yeshua" (Thank you Jesus). A brother was happy. Her hands began to move. Family entered the room. Laughter erupted. Hugs were exchanged. Granny began making moves that seemed to mean "Ya'll are making too much noise." Granny re-arranged herself in her bed. She asked my Great cousin Vivian, who I always thought was my aunt, for some water. Aunt Biddie (Vivian) gently rubbed cold water onto Granny's lips providing some comfort. Granny cannot swallow anything without choking in her current state. She couldn't drink any water. More family arrived, Granny began opening her eyes and began asking for ice, water, something to drink, and began waving at the assembly. I felt safe.

Later that afternoon I returned to the room after escorting the Wifey to the Fox theatre to view the Broadway production of The Color Purple. The theatre was about three blocks away from the hospital. Mum was in the room surrounded by smiling faces. I kissed Granny on her shoulder and she waved both hands shooing me away from her. Granny was trying to talk and probably was giving instructions as she was accustomed. I made plans to travel to one of my cousin's homes to allow my kids to play with their cousins. I grabbed my lil' girls hand and placed one hand upon Granny and prayed a prayer of thanks. As I looked up I noticed a blush upon my mother's face that was full of distraught. We reversed places. She used to hold my as I cried. Today, I held her as she cried. Mums in despair, I felt a sense of comfort.

That night I returned to the hospital to pick up Wifey. She walked to the hospital after the play as I was stuck in Hot-Lanta's crazy-tail traffic. Wifey shared how Granny was visited by another minister and was sitting up in her bed singing and clapping in praise. Christ's protection may not be always evident, but there's always evidence. I smiled thinking "We not ready, they're not ready." considering the feeling I received earlier. Granny's new life is upon her.

Post script:
While adding this post the morning after the experience I received notice that Granny was sitting up last night and has movement in one of her arm and legs. Asante Sana Yeshua. Also I've found that I was right about the "Ka" meaning "The soul" or "My Soul" , it normally referrs to the persons twin. The soul is one twin, the body is the other in traditional Kemetian beliefs. "Ori" is a Hebrew name meaning "My light" or "The Origin of" and has been used to describe the concept of stregnth as in "My stregnth". Her Daddy described her as being feisty and my observations concurred with his assessment. Her soul is her stregnth. I'm not sure yet what cultural origin or meaning the parents settled upon as they named Kaori (I forgot to ask), but my intuition that she was gong to be powerful seemed to be sound. May her new life be a blessing.

Seko VArner - Team VArner
"I just work here."