I've been really considering my mother's mortality lately. Watching my children's face as they embrace their "Be-be" has been a great source of joy lately. Where will I stand when they, and I, have to walk up to life's bed and touch the eyebrows of an ancestor named 'My Mama'. I used to fight people when they mouths formed the words "Yo' Mama". (I wish I could say that I won all of those fights. Thank GOD for Martial Arts !) I used to run to her arms after bruising my knees or my ego. I used to run from her into the protective arms of my Pops placing him in danger of Mum's wailing arms, belts, branches, extension cords, or whatever she could get her hands on to inflict discipline.
I once dated a woman who was never the same following the passage of her Mum. She never finished school, and worked beneath herself during the times we were together. She attributed her misfortune to the passing of her mum.....yet never seemed to do anything to honor her Mum via works. I always told myself that I'd never be affected in the same manner.......Yet today Mum is in the hospital again and I'm numb, wondering if I need to prepare myself for something I'm not prepared for. After receiving the news that Mum only had bronchitis again my spirits were only slightly lifted. Sometimes ancestorships walks into ones life, slowly and quietly. I don't know if this is the beginning of the glory of walking into glory, or simply another one of life's difficulties. There is so much that I don't know, yet there is much that I do know. My Mum has been one of the rocks in my life. As much as I've become much of a Poppa's boy in the last few years, the times spent with Mum....being beaten by Mum......being supported by Mum...being loved by Mum....and being guided by Mum has directed me to become much of what I am today.
My Judaic-Christian background has promoted the understanding of the Creator being simply the Father, yet my interactions with the almighty have given me a truly broader understanding of our 'Heavenly' parent. The creative force that dwells in me, outside of me, and in you is larger than the descriptions we have for it. GOD is limitless, similar to the love a mother has for her children. My experience with GOD has been motherly at times, feeling the spirit kiss on my soulful wounds as I've tripped and fell over my blessings and difficulties. Mum's kiss would make me forget of the pain, the creator's kiss has done the same. GOD loves GOD's children like a strong mother loves her children. Understanding GOD has allowed me to understand my Mum. Thank Good-orderly-direction for the blessings of knowing my mother and knowing my mother's love.
Today I know that Mum will return from the hospital. Today I thank the creator for her life. Today I thank the ancestors for their watchful eyes and messages. Today I'll be ever to make it through another day knowing that I have a Mother that I can hug and hold and adore. GOD bless our mothers and mother-ancestors. Ashee-Amen-AhMother.
Seko VArner
